Grief is expensive. It's also common but many health plans don't realize what bereavement is costing them. To make these hidden costs visible, the team at Help Texts created a tool that health plans can use to model bereavement’s financial impacts. With just member numbers, the Bereavement Cost Calculator from Help Texts will estimate a health plan’s: ● Projected Per Member Per Month (PMPM) cost increase after bereavement ● Total cost impact of grief when no intervention is provided ● Estimated savings when plans provide Help Texts’ clinically sound, scalable, grief support for bereaved members

With many years' experience supporting people after a human death, Help Texts partnered with palliative care veterinarians and grief experts to craft compassionate, evidence-based text messages to help pet owners navigate the emotional aftermath of loss. Whether the loss was sudden or expected, we personalize supportive text messages based on:

• Type of pet (dog, cat, bird, horse, etc.)
• Cause of death (illness, accident, euthanasia, etc.)
• Key dates (adoption anniversaries, birthdays, etc.)

We make it easy to support your valued clients with a full year of tailored grief support that they will always remember.

Benefits of Supporting Pet Owners After a Loss

Extend Compassionate Care Beyond the Clinic

Partnering with Help Texts allows your veterinary practice to offer expert, ongoing grief support to every pet owner after a loss. Our service complements your in-clinic care, eases the burden on your team, and ensures no grieving family feels forgotten.

Strengthen Client Relationships

Continue caring for pet owners even after their pet is gone; when they need support the most.

• Honor meaningful dates like adoption anniversaries and birthdays
• Help friends and family show up with supportive tips and reminders
• Build lifelong trust by showing continued compassion beyond the clinic

Reduce Operational Strain

Provide exceptional grief support without increasing your team’s workload.

• Ease emotional demands on staff without sacrificing client care
• Reduce turnover and stress-related burnout in emotionally heavy moments
• Offer consistent follow-up care without additional staffing

Build Community Trust

Your commitment to compassionate care sets you apart. Help Texts makes it visible.

• Show clients and the community that your care doesn’t end at goodbye
• Differentiate your practice with grief support that goes beyond industry norms
• Strengthen your role as a trusted partner in the full life of every pet

Your Compassion, Extended

As veterinary professionals, you chose this field because you care deeply about animals and the people who love them. Help Texts for Pet Loss is an extension of that same compassion you show every day in your practice.

When you partner with Help Texts, you're not just offering a service - you're ensuring that the care and understanding you provide in those final moments continues long after families leave your clinic. You're acknowledging that pet loss deserves the same thoughtful support we offer for any significant grief, and making sure no one has to navigate that journey alone.

Ready to extend your compassionate care beyond the clinic? Contact us today to learn more about Help Texts for Pet Loss. Because the love between pets and their families doesn't end when life does, and neither should your support.

About Help Texts

Help Texts is the world's leading clinically sound, scalable, bereavement intervention. We deliver affordable, multilingual support globally via text message for all of life's toughest moments. With extraordinary acceptability (95%) and 6-month retention (90%) rates, Help Texts' light-weight solution makes it easy for employers, providers, payers, and others to improve health and community outcomes, while also realizing significant cost savings for those in their care.

Life can be hard. Getting support shouldn't have to be. 💙 Help Texts is proud to be delivering personalized, expert grief and mental health support in 62 countries and 29 languages. All year long.

From Halloween through New Year’s, the holidays come back to back. Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas, and Kwanzaa can arrive more quickly than you can emotionally handle. Each one brings invitations, traditions, and reminders that your person isn’t there.

The parts of holiday grief no one warns you about

• Their favorite holiday song comes on in the grocery store.
• A holiday card arrives addressed to both of you.
• Someone asks how you’re “holding up” for the fourth time in one evening.
• You reach for the ornament they always hung.
• The family photo has one less person in it, and everyone notices.
• You feel guilty for having a good time, and then guilty for not having one.

If any of these have happened to you, you’re not alone. These moments are a normal part of grieving through the holidays.

The holiday invitation decision tree

Use this every time an invitation comes in. You can get a different answer for each event, and you can change your answer the day of.

Before you go

• If you can, drive yourself. Having your own way home means you can leave the moment you need to.
• Tell one person what’s going on. Ask them to check on you during the event, or to help you slip out if you need to.
• Plan your answer to “How are you?” Something short works: “Some days are harder than others. Thanks for asking.”
• Give yourself a break before and after. Plan an easy morning, or an evening at home with nothing planned, around a big event.
• Decide one event at a time. Saying yes to Thanksgiving doesn’t mean you have to say yes to New Year’s.

Frequently asked questions

Is it okay to skip holiday events when you’re grieving?
Yes. Staying home is a reasonable choice, and so is going for a short time. You can decide about each event separately.

How do I leave a holiday party early without explaining?
You can leave without a round of goodbyes and send the host a short thank-you text later. Driving yourself makes this easier.

You don’t have to figure out the whole season today. You only have to decide about the next invitation.

Thanksgiving is a day for gathering with family and friends. That's why it's so noticeable when someone is missing. You might wonder whether it's okay to bring them up, or whether mentioning them will spoil the mood of the day. For most people, even a simple acknowledgment is better than nothing at all. When no one says anything, the silence is often harder to manage emotionally than hearing someone say out loud that a person we loved is no longer with us.

Every family handles grief differently. Some families will want a serious moment, and others will laugh their way through it. Some will mention the person once and move on. All of these are okay.

Three ways to bring them into the day

Sentimental

Best for: Families who are comfortable showing emotion together.

Ideas: Set a place for them at the table. Put out a few photos. Ask each person to share one memory, or include your loved one in the prayer before the meal.

What you might say: "Before we eat, we want to remember Mom. We're grateful for every Thanksgiving we had with her."

Humorous

Best for: Families who connect through laughter, or whose person loved to make everyone laugh.

Ideas: Make their signature drink and name it after them. Toast their funniest Thanksgiving moment. Or play "most likely to," where everyone finishes the sentence "Dad was most likely to ___ on Thanksgiving."

What you might say: "Here's to Uncle Ray, who never let anyone carve the turkey without his commentary."

Simple

Best for: Families who find it hard to talk about feelings, or a year when the loss is still very new.

Ideas: Say one sentence before the meal, then let the day go on.

What you might say: "We miss Grandpa today, and we honor him by showing up for each other."

One sentence is enough. You don't have to say more.

How to keep it from feeling overwhelming

• Ask ahead of time. Talk to the person closest to the loss before Thanksgiving. "I'd like to say something about Jen at dinner. Would that feel okay, or would you rather we keep it short?"
• Choose one person to lead it. That way no one is caught off guard, and no one has to wonder whether it's their place to speak.
• Do it early in the meal. Once someone has said the person's name, everyone can relax into the rest of the day.
• Mix approaches. A sentimental prayer can be followed by a funny story. Families often want both.
• Agree on what everyone can accept. Family members may want different things. One person may want a prayer while another wants to keep it light. If you can't agree, choose the simplest option, because a short acknowledgment usually works for everyone.
• Give people a way out. Let everyone know it's okay to step outside or take a break if they need one.
• Include the kids. Children may want to draw a picture for the empty chair or share a favorite memory.
• Take care of yourself too. If you're the one grieving, you don't have to host, stay all day, or take part in every tradition. It's okay to arrive late, leave early, or skip the parts that feel like too much this year.

This Thanksgiving may look different from the ones before it, and next year may look different again. Whatever you choose to do this year is enough.

Frequently asked questions

Should we set a place at the table for someone who died?

You can, if your family finds it comforting. Some families prefer photos or a memory shared during the meal instead.

What if my family doesn't want to talk about it?

A simple acknowledgment works well for families who find these conversations hard. One sentence before the meal is enough.

Grief Coach CEO, Emma Payne, speaks with Kendra Rinaldi in this podcast about how grief has taught her to live in the moment.

There’s a movement afoot, and as the new broadway beetlejuice show suggests; It’s all about death. From death cafes and death over dinner, to the surge in new netflix shows like dead to me and after life, new life is pouring into old conversations about death.

The lesson isn't that AI is replacing human connection, but rather that AI is showing us (or reminding us) exactly what human connection should look like. Every feature that makes grief-focused AI effective is something humans can do better, with the added benefit of genuine empathy, shared experience, and authentic, in-person care.

What you do in the days and weeks after their loss matters, and your employee will remember it. Managers and employees often describe workplace support differently. Managers tend to talk about leave policies and coverage. Employees talk about understanding, empathy, and having someone available. Both matter, and this guide helps you offer both.

Why grief support at work matters

Grief doesn't stay home. When an employee experiences a major loss, it shows up in their work, their wellbeing, and their decision about whether to stay.

• 76% of bereaved employees say their work performance suffered after the death.
• 42.7% say they seldom or never received support from their manager.
• 44.6% have tried to suppress their emotions at work.
• 79% consider quitting their jobs after a major loss because of limited support.

The 3C framework: Connect, Collaborate, Cultivate

The Connect, Collaborate, Cultivate framework gives you the same three steps for every phase of the first year, so you can offer real support without overthinking it. Work through them in order. Compassion comes first, and operational needs get handled throughout rather than up front.

1. Connect (manager to employee): Show compassion first. Nothing operational until the death has been acknowledged.
2. Collaborate (manager and employee together): Work out what needs to happen, covering personal needs as well as professional ones.
3. Cultivate (manager and the team): Help everyone else show up in a way that actually helps.

The framework covers four phases, each one a moment in the first year that employees and teams find hardest:

• At notification, before bereavement leave
• Preparing to come back to work
• Returning to work
• Long-term follow-up, through the first anniversary

Want to keep this guide on hand? Download the free Supporting a Grieving Employee checklist and print it off, so you have every step and script ready when you need it.

Phase 1: When you first hear the news

Connect: Acknowledge the loss first

Offer your condolences.

"I heard that [name or relation] died. Losing someone can be so hard. I wanted to personally give you my condolences and offer to sit with you and hold space right now."

Then pause.

Let them choose what happens next.

"What would be most helpful to you right now: sharing a bit more about what happened, or working through some of the work-related bereavement logistics together?"

Follow their answer. The practical conversation can happen right away or after they're done sharing.

If they want to talk, ask about the person rather than the death.

"What was [name or relation] like? How was your relationship?"

Listen without filling the pauses. Hold back reassurance, and avoid phrases like "at least," "everything happens for a reason," or "you're strong." Don't assume the relationship was close or easy.

If they don't want to talk, move to the practical side when they're ready.

"I understand it can be hard to talk about it right now. Let me help you with the operational things."

Collaborate: Work out the logistics together

Start by understanding what's weighing on them most.

"What's something work-related that's worrying you most right now?"

Personal needs to cover:

• PTO and bereavement leave. Check whether your policy covers this relationship. If it doesn't, do your best to work something out.
• Travel time, and whether they'll want time after the service as well as before it.
• Bereavement benefits, EAP details, and other support resources. Send these once, in a single message.
• Whether they want to hear from you while they're away, and through which channel.
• A touch-base before they come back.

"I can check in by phone or text while you're away, and you don't need to respond. Would that be okay, or would you prefer to go offline entirely? Both are okay."

"Before you come back, I'd like to connect so we can plan around your preferences for returning to work."

Professional needs to cover:

• Reallocate their work while they're away, and record who has what.
• Ask about pressing deadlines or deliverables that need to be on someone's radar.
• Confirm what the team will be told, and who will tell them.
• Agree on a return date, and let them know it can be flexible.
• Turn off on-call, system alerts, and calendar invitations.
• Write down the name or relationship of the person who died and the date of the death. You'll need this for Phase 4.

Cultivate: Prepare your team

• Tell the team only what the employee approved, and say whether reaching out to them is welcome.
• Ask colleagues about task-sharing, assign coverage, and track who's covering what.
• Give the team a few condolence messages they can use.

"I heard that [name or relation] died. I've been thinking about you ever since."

"Sending you my deepest condolences on the loss of [name or relation]. Thinking of you and your family today. No reply needed."

Decide together whether the manager or a staff-appointed lead will send a condolence card from everyone, send a meal gift card or coordinate a meal drop-off, or send flowers or a donation to a charity of the family's choice.

Standardize your bereavement response. Whatever you do for one employee, do for every employee. If you send a meal card for one loss, send it for all of them. When the response varies, it signals that some losses matter more than others.

Phase 2: Preparing to come back to work

Connect: Start with them, not with work

A few days before they return, reach out and lead with how they're doing.

"Hi [name]. Before we jump into a return-to-work conversation, I wanted to start by just touching base. I've been wondering how you've been holding up lately, and how the funeral was for you."

Then pause. This invites them to start with their grief rather than logistics.

Listen until they reach a natural stopping point, then validate what you heard before moving on.

"Thank you for sharing more about the past few weeks. I know coming back to work doesn't mean you're no longer grieving. Grief will be present on most days, so my goal is to work with you on a plan that eases you back in."

Jot down anything important.

Collaborate: Build the return plan

Ask whether a phased or full return suits them better.

"I want to make sure you have the flexibility you need. Some people like to jump right back in, but that can be stressful, so many prefer a staggered approach where we build the workload back up over time. Which sounds best to you?"

Tell them how the first day will begin so nothing is a surprise.

"When you come back, you and I will block the first hour or so together to build the work plan."

Personal needs to decide on this call:

• Whether they want their return acknowledged openly by the group or individually. Both are okay.
• Anything they'd rather the team didn't ask them about.
• The private spaces available to them if they need a break.

Professional needs, the agenda for their first hour back:

• The first week's workload, agreed together and written down.
• One or two priorities that genuinely matter, and what can wait.
• Which meetings and accounts to step back into, and which to hold off on a little longer.
• Who keeps the shared work, and how the employee takes pieces back over time.
• A written summary of what happened while they were away.
• When system access, calendar, and on-call get turned back on.
• How they can step out of a meeting or take a moment on a hard day.
• Permission to block their calendar as busy for estate paperwork, probate, or closing bank accounts, which often have to happen during business hours.
• Whether they want regular check-ins over the first month.
• A reminder of available support resources. Give them a printed list.

"If something hits you during the day, you can step out of anything without explaining yourself. I'll cover it."

Cultivate: Get the team ready

• Ask colleagues who covered projects to write a summary of what was done, and pull it into one document.
• Encourage colleagues to meet with the employee to give a verbal update and answer questions.
• If the employee named topics they'd rather not be asked about, make sure the team knows.
• Share the return date and only what the employee approved, including whether they want their return acknowledged.
• Let the team know task-sharing continues through the first month, and that the employee will take work back gradually based on their plan.
• Give the team a few ideas for what to say on the first day.

"It's good to see you. I've been thinking about you."

"No need to talk about anything at all. I just wanted to say I'm glad you're back. I can make time today if you want to catch up."

Phase 3: The first day back

Connect: Be there first thing

Be there at the start of the day, and ask about them before anything work-related.

"I'm really glad you're back. Before we get into anything at all, how are you holding up this morning?"

Getting through the door is often the hardest part of the first day, and their answer tells you how much to ask of them.

Then say out loud that today doesn't have to go well, even if you already agreed to this on the phone. Permission given on a call rarely feels real once someone is back in the building.

"Nothing has to feel normal today. If you need to step out of anything at any point, you can, and you don't need to give a reason."

Collaborate: Use the first hour to build the plan

"Let's use this hour to put your plan together. Nothing we decide today is set in stone, and we can adjust it along the way."

Personal needs: confirm what may have changed since your call.

• Whether they want their return acknowledged by the group or individually.
• Any topics they'd rather not be asked about, and whether that's changed.
• Where the private spaces are if they need a break.
• What resources are available to them.

Professional needs: the work plan.

• Give a verbal and written update on what happened with their work while they were away.
• Encourage them to meet with the colleagues who covered for them.
• Stagger taking back tasks across this week and next, agreed together and written down.
• Confirm one or two priorities that genuinely matter, and what can wait.
• Turn system access, calendar, and communication channels back on.
• Remind them they can step out of a meeting or take a moment whenever they need to.
• Remind them they can block their calendar for personal matters like estate paperwork or probate.
• Agree on how often they want check-ins, and book them now.
• Book an end-of-week check-in.

"What was hardest this week, and what should we change for next week?"

Then adjust the plan with them.

Cultivate: Keep the team human-centered

• Remind the team how the employee would like to be greeted and approached.
• Ask colleagues who covered the employee's work to make time to share important updates.
• Remind the team to check in first, then move to tasks.

"I'm glad you're back. I've been thinking about you. How are you managing right now?"

"Before we get into work things, can we just touch base on how you're doing?"

Let the team know their colleague may be forgetful, easily overwhelmed, or tearful for weeks to months. This is normal. Encourage patience and gentle reminders, especially in the first few weeks, and invite the team to come to you if they need more support or guidance.

Phase 4: Long-term follow-up through the first anniversary

Set these reminders now

Using what you recorded in Phase 1, add these to your calendar:

• Check-ins at month one, month three, and month six.
• The first anniversary of the death.
• The birthday of the person who died, only if the employee shared it.
• The first holiday season, which can be especially hard for anyone heading into it with someone missing.

Connect: Keep it personal

Open every check-in with the person, not the work.

"I wanted to check in, and not about work. How have things been for you these past few weeks?"

Pause and listen. Check-ins should feel relational first and operationally helpful at the end.

Acknowledge meaningful dates as they arrive.

"I know this week would have been [name or relation]'s birthday. I've been thinking about you and your family."

Only do this for dates they shared with you, and don't go looking for them. You don't need to remember these dates year after year, but doing it in the first year matters a great deal.

Mark the one-year anniversary instead of letting it pass.

"I know what this week is. A year doesn't mean the grief is gone. Grief has no finish line. I'm still here."

Offer the day off in advance rather than waiting to be asked, and send a card or personal note. About two weeks beforehand, share resources on getting through a first anniversary, like our guide on how to get through your first death anniversary.

Collaborate: Three check-ins across the year

Month one: Are they managing a full workload?

"Let's start with a grief check-in. What's been hard for you lately?"

Then:

"You're carrying your full workload again. Is that feeling manageable? If not, can we come up with some ideas together for what might help between now and our next check-in?"

Find out whether the workload is genuinely manageable or only restored on paper, whether any shared tasks should come back to them or stay shared, and whether check-ins should continue at this frequency or move to quarterly.

Month three: Expect more strain, not less.

Around this point, outside support tends to fall away and grief often deepens.

"Around three months is usually when family and friends start checking in less, and grief often gets harder rather than easier. I want to check in on how you're doing and whether you feel you have enough support around you."

Watch for absenteeism, presenteeism, and decreased productivity, and name them as grief rather than performance issues. Re-offer flexibility rather than waiting for them to ask.

Month six: Rebuild the plan.

The original plan is six months old now. Rebuild it rather than simply reviewing it.

"We built this plan six months ago. What's working for you now, and is there anything we should change?"

Do a full workload review. If performance has declined, open it as a support conversation and say so plainly.

"I've noticed the last few weeks have looked harder. This isn't a performance conversation. What would help?"

Remind them of the resources available to them. Grieving employees need to hear about their support options many times throughout the year.

Cultivate: Help the team stay the course

• Remind the team that the first holidays without the person are often hard.
• Let the team know the anniversary is coming, if the employee agreed to that.
• Remind the team that absenteeism, presenteeism, and lower productivity are common in the first year after a significant loss, and encourage grace and kindness.
• Keep the employee included in the same work and social activities they were part of before.
• Give the team examples of what to say on the anniversary.

"Just wanted to let you know I'm thinking about you today. I know [name] is missed every day, and a little extra today."

"It's hard to imagine it's been a year since [name] died. I'd love to see a photo or hear a memory, if you're up for that."

The checklist ends here. Grief doesn't.

Help Texts is a text-based mental health and grief support solution that gives employees personalized, expert support during the life events traditional benefits often miss. Support arrives directly by text, with no app, appointments, or waitlist.

Help Texts is designed to complement your existing EAP, behavioral health, and wellbeing benefits, extending support beyond the traditional point of care. Core areas of support include grief and bereavement, mental health and emotional wellbeing, caregiver support, healthcare worker burnout and compassion fatigue, pregnancy loss, pet loss, and life transitions including divorce and menopause.

Learn how Help Texts supports your employees or email info@helptexts.com.

Want to keep this guide on hand? Download the free Supporting a Grieving Employee checklist and print it off, so you have every step and script ready when you need it.

As always, I want to start with a few of the messages we received from our subscribers this past month. These are the words that remind us why this work matters.

I know I wouldn’t be around without the support of these messages. I was drowning, could see the top of the water, but could not reach it without sinking each time. Your messages and remembering all the major dates and occasions with/for dad have helped me. The continuity of the messages is a beam of light through darkness.

Most helpful is that in a short message it’s understanding my situation and suggesting very sensitive and useful actions which I can take to help my daughter through grief.

Knowing how to support a grieving employee can be hard to navigate. Help Texts’ clinical team created an easy-to-follow, actionable, grief-informed guide to help company leaders support employees and teams through loss.

If you’ve ever wished your company had a better bereavement benefit or program, we’d love for you to read the guide here and share it with your leadership team. It contains steps for all phases of bereavement:

• At notification, before bereavement leave
• Preparing to come back to work
• Return to work
• Long-term follow-up

In September, our CCO Melissa Lunardini and colleagues published new research on behalf of the International Work Group on Death, Dying and Bereavement (IWG), setting out principles for how AI should be developed and used in grief support. The paper classifies grief AI tools by risk level and concludes that AI can complement human-centered care when it’s built with transparency, cultural sensitivity, and a commitment to human dignity over commercial interests. Read the research.

If you'll be attending the National Alliance of Care at Home annual meeting this year, we'd love to connect. Our CRO, Steve Harstad, will be in Washington, D.C. later this month for the NACH conference, connecting with hospice teams about bringing Help Texts' support to the families they serve. If you're attending, we'd love to meet you. Just reply to this email and we'll find a time.

With gratitude,
Emma Payne
CEO Help Texts

If you know someone who might appreciate our monthly dose of good news, please invite them to subscribe. And as always, remember that you can visit our website to learn more about Help Texts for your organization.

Six Lessons Learned in a Turbulent Year

It was December 2015 — a decade ago — that I flew home from a dear friend’s funeral in Toronto. He was the best friend of my husband, who had died by suicide years earlier. I spent the 5-hour flight thinking about the loneliness of grief, and brainstorming ways to make sure nobody ever had to grieve alone. By the time I landed I'd mapped out a text-based grief support service that I imagined might one day deliver expert, tailored, tips and wisdom to grievers around the world.

There have been a lot of 16-hour days since then. I’ve learned so much in the last ten years as we’ve built Help Texts into the company I dreamed it could be. Some of my biggest lessons learned came in the last year as nearly everything became uncertain. Government funding cuts and layoffs hit us hard. The AI investment frenzy was making people do all kinds of crazy things. Turnover was so dizzying that we were training new employees and meeting new customer leads every week, it seemed.

But, as in grief, challenges are what really give us a chance to test our mettle. When things turn upside down, we see what we’re capable of.

As we turn the corner to 2026, I realize that the ups & downs of 2025 showed me just how resilient and vital Help Texts has become. Instead of waiting for policy shifts and more stable markets, we acted on what we could see, worked with new partners, and adjusted without drama. We embarked on research with partners including the University of Miami, UCLA, and Canada’s National Research Council. We launched a brand new product focused on healthy aging, as well as a powerful Bereavement Cost Calculator for payers. We made the move to monthly, pay-as-you-go pricing too. I’m proud of my team for being willing to keep moving, even when things were unclear.

Here are just a few of the things we learned as we bobbed and weaved.

We learned that retention is the strongest signal of usefulness

Help Texts now supports subscribers in 50 states and 62 countries. That’s meaningful, but what matters even more is what happens after people engage.

In 2025, we saw a 93% customer renewal rate, including our first multi-year renewals. We saw organizations expand within their accounts, adopting multiple programs over time.

Despite massive uncertainty and financial pressures, Help Texts’ customers chose to continue offering Help Texts to their employees, bereaved families, and communities. So while things around us were chaotic, we saw that text remains a powerful and effective tool. We learned that results matter and that our customers would stick with us, even when times were tough.

We learned that accessibility builds trust

One of the clearest lessons this year was that improving accessibility is always a win. From the beginning, Help Texts has focused on removing the barriers to grief and mental health support. We write for a 7th-grade reading level, are available in 29 languages, and don’t require a Zoom connection or smartphone. In 2025 we tackled the biggest barrier of all: cost. We spent the better half of Q2 moving Help Texts to a new payment processor so that we could — at last — offer pay-as-you-go, monthly subscriptions.

Reducing up-front costs and making monthly subscriptions available quickly opened the door to exciting revenue share partnerships with charities. It also made it possible for us to offer more flexible, affordable, PMPM, and PEPM pricing for payers and employers, and increased consumer uptake too.

We learned that AI is not an end in itself

At Help Texts, we listen carefully to our customers, and to prospective customers too. As investors fell over themselves for the latest AI innovations, we noticed that health authorities, healthcare providers, researchers, and bereavement professionals were increasingly uneasy about putting GenAI in front of their vulnerable populations.

At the same time, we knew that AI could exponentially increase our ability to conduct sentiment analysis, assess response needs, and quickly catch signs of crisis from our subscribers around the world. We secured federal funding to conduct AI research in 2025, which has been transformative for Help Texts and — because we like to share what we learn — will be transformative for the bereavement field overall. My Chief Clinical Officer, Melissa Lunardini, will be sharing our learnings next year at the Association for Death Education & Counseling (ADEC) national conference in Maryland, at the National Association for Children’s Grief (NACG) conference in Texas, and at the International Death, Dying, and Bereavement (IDDB) conference in Wisconsin.

AI has enormous potential, but it's critical to balance novelty, efficiency, and judgment, especially when working with at risk populations. I’m proud that Help Texts' leaned into AI in 2025, established ourselves as thought leaders, and found responsible ways to make our platform more efficient than ever.

We learned that grief is very, very expensive

We worked with a lot of healthcare providers, payers, and big thinkers in 2025 to launch the Bereavement Cost Calculator as a way to illustrate that grief is very — VERY — expensive. In addition to the significant human impacts, research shows that bereavement leads to a 20%-30% increase in health care utilization.

Having the opportunity to ratchet up my own learning & understanding of the US healthcare system was a big deal in 2025. I’m grateful to all the leaders who shared their time and wisdom with me and hope the calculator nudges health plans - especially Medicare Advantage plans - to quickly offer grief support as a way to offset the hundreds of millions of dollars they’re spending annually (usually without realizing it) to support bereaved members.

We learned the immense value of a disciplined outside perspective

I am incredibly lucky to have world-class experts who believe in Help Texts (and in me) and have offered to put in real time to help me expand this year. I launched an advisory board in 2025 and am deeply grateful to Mike Stein, Matthew Holt, Matt Walters, Galen Buckwalter, Ken Black, Sam Blackman, Katrina Spade, and James Sherrett for spending countless hours with me this year, helping me think BIG about the power of text to bring people from hopelessness to hopefulness.

Spending time with brilliant people this year has been — well — brilliant!

We learned what actually matters

2025 was stressful and unpredictable, and my team rose to the occasion. I’m immensely grateful to the Help Texts’ team for their courage, determination, & creativity under pressure. It’s working with them every day, to support people often in their darkest times, that matters the most to me. I’ll bob and weave every day of every year, if it means I can keep making a difference and hearing feedback like these messages we received in December:

“These texts have been amazing. They make me understand how I’m feeling is normal and all part of the grieving process.”

"Your texts have reached my soul in ways no one else could. They speak to my situation that most people just don’t understand.”

“I look forward to these texts so much. They’ve been a life line to me. Please don’t stop. They have been a huge help."

The world may be uncertain, but I’ve never been more certain that the work we’re doing at Help Texts really matters. I’m closing out the year feeling more grateful and proud than ever, to be doing this work.

What does "Grieving Properly" actually mean?

The idea that there is a right way to grieve is one of the most persistent and harmful myths about loss. For decades, pop psychology promoted the five stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance) as a linear roadmap, but grief is not a straight line and doesn’t have a finish line.

Clinicians and thanatologists agree on the fact that healthy grieving is grief that is felt, processed, and integrated, not avoided, suppressed, or rushed.

According to research published in the Journal of Medical Internet Research, SMS has played a critical role in the advancement of mobile health, this is because support works best when it is accessible, consistent, and ongoing, not a single intervention at the moment of loss.

Help Texts delivers expert-written, personalized grief support via text message, making it available to people wherever they are. Our published research shows 95% acceptability rate and 90% six-month retention, Help Texts reaches grieving people in 62 countries and 29 languages, guided by a team of thanatologists and grief specialists.

Get Help Texts for only $9.99 USD/month.

Source: Dobson, R., Whittaker, R., Abroms, L. C., Bramley, D., Free, C., McRobbie, H., Stowell, M., & Rodgers, A. (2024). Don’t Forget the Humble Text Message: 25 Years of Text Messaging in Health. Journal of Medical Internet Research, 26, e59888. https://doi.org/10.2196/59888

Grief is expensive. In addition to the significant human impacts, research shows that bereavement leads to a 20%-30% increase in health care utilization.¹

Grief is also common. While we may not like to talk about it, 37% of Americans are grieving a recent death.⁸ The U.S. averaged 3.26 million deaths per year over the last five years ⁷ and data suggests that an average of nine people grieve a single death.⁶ The CDC started measuring bereavement for the first time in 2021, but most health plans aren’t yet measuring the incidence or cost of grief.

So we decided to take a look. Here’s just some of what we found.

When a member is bereaved, health plans — especially those serving older adults — see significant jumps in utilization and costs across multiple claims categories. Examples include:

• 51% increase in Emergency Department visits and 43% increase in hospitalizations for bereaved spouses whose partners died in hospital ⁵
• 67% higher risk level for psychiatric hospitalization in the first year of bereavement for parents who have lost a child ²
• 74% of husbands and 67% of wives are hospitalized at least once in the nine years following the death of their spouse ³
• 463% higher odds of antidepressant use for people who have a prolonged grief disorder diagnosis ⁴

These increases lead to escalating claims costs that add up quickly, especially in populations 65+. But what are these costs? And what can insurers do to mitigate them?

Introducing the Bereavement Cost Calculator from Help Texts

To make these hidden costs visible, the team at Help Texts created a tool that health plans can use to model bereavement’s financial impacts. With just your member numbers, the Bereavement Cost Calculator from Help Texts will estimate your health plan’s:

• Projected Per Member Per Month (PMPM) cost increase after bereavement
• Total cost impact of grief when no intervention is provided
• Estimated savings when plans provide Help Texts’ clinically sound, scalable, grief support for bereaved members

Case Study

Consider a Medicare Advantage Plan with 250K members ages 65+. They should expect:

• 11,500 members to be grieving the death of a partner or child
• 81,500 members to be grieving other losses (eg. parent, sibling, friend)
• Average PMPM increase (without intervention): $120
• Potential PMPM savings with Help Texts: $20
• Total estimated year one cost impact (without intervention): $134M *
• Potential year one cost reduction with Help Texts: $22.8M

*Note that costs often continue to increase in the years after a bereavement

What can you do to save money and improve care and outcomes for your members?

The numbers are powerful, showing that grief is expensive, but also that bereavement presents a clear opportunity to provide an impactful upstream intervention that can save millions, while also caring for people during what is often the loneliest time in their lives.

Enter Help Texts, the world's leading clinically sound, scalable, bereavement intervention. With subscribers in 62 countries and all 50 states, Help Texts delivers affordable, multilingual grief support via text message. With extraordinary acceptability (95%) and 6-month retention (90%) rates, Help Texts' light-weight solution makes it easy for health plans and others to improve health and community outcomes, while also realizing significant cost savings for those in their care.

👉 Try the Bereavement Cost Calculator from Help Texts today to uncover the savings potential when you care for grieving members. In less than a minute, you can start to see how much bereavement is costing you, and how much you could save by supporting members grieving the loss of a loved one.

Because the true cost of bereavement isn’t only emotional, it’s also financial. And for health plans, addressing both is the smartest investment you can make.

References

1. Miles, T. P., Allegra, J. C., Ezeamama, A., Simpson, C., Gerst-Emerson, K., & Elkins, J. (2016). In a Longevity Society, Loss and Grief Are Emerging Risk Factors for Health Care Use: Findings From the Health and Retirement Survey Cohort Aged 50 to 70 Years. The American journal of hospice & palliative care, 33(1), 41–46. https://doi.org/10.1177/1049909114552125
2. Li, J., Laursen, T. M., Precht, D. H., Olsen, J., & Mortensen, P. B. (2005). Hospitalization for mental illness among parents after the death of a child. The New England journal of medicine, 352(12), 1190–1196. https://doi.org/10.1056/NEJMoa033160
3. Christakis, N. A., & Allison, P. D. (2006). Mortality after the hospitalization of a spouse. The New England journal of medicine, 354(7), 719–730. https://doi.org/10.1056/NEJMsa050196
4. Nielsen, M. K., Pedersen, H. S., Sparle Christensen, K., Neergaard, M. A., Bidstrup, P. E., & Guldin, M. (2025). Grief trajectories and long-term health effects in bereaved relatives: A prospective, population-based cohort study with ten-year follow-up. Frontiers in Public Health, 13, 1619730. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpubh.2025.1619730
5. Ornstein, K. A., Garrido, M. M., Siu, A. L., Bollens-Lund, E., Langa, K. M., & Kelley, A. S. (2018). Impact of In-Hospital Death on Spending for Bereaved Spouses. Health services research, 53 Suppl 1, 2696–2717. https://doi.org/10.1111/1475-6773.12841
6. Verdery, Ashton M., Emily Smith-Greenaway, Rachel Margolis, & Jonathan Daw. “Tracking the reach of COVID-19 kin loss with a bereavement multiplier applied to the United States.” Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, Vol. 117, No. 30 (2020): 17695-17701. https://doi.org/10.1073/pnas.2007476117
7. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, National Center for Health Statistics. (2021–2024). National Vital Statistics Reports (NVSR) and Vital Statistics Rapid Release (Provisional Mortality Data). Hyattsville, MD: U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.
8. Koenig, D. (2019, July 11). The grief experience: Survey shows it’s complicated. WebMD. https://www.webmd.com/balance/grief-stages-special-report/default.htm

In 2022 Lianna was introduced to Emma Payne, an entrepreneur whose company - Help Texts - was providing expert grief support to families grieving the death of a loved one, all via text message. Emma had started hearing from people grieving a pet death, who wished they could receive the same robust and thoughtful year of text support that Help Texts subscribers grieving the death of a person was receiving. Emma agreed, and Lianna was one of the first to step forward and offer her expertise. Together they talked about the nuances and special considerations when supporting pet parents after their animal dies. They talked about the need to support families after a euthanasia for example, or when an animal goes missing and isn’t found.

A year later Help Texts for Pet Loss was born. The service launched in July of 2023, and Lianna was happy to introduce Help Texts to the pet loss community at the International Association for Animal Hospice and Palliative Care (IAAHPC) conference held in Fort Worth in September.

“Grieving a pet often leads to disenfranchised grief,” Lianna says. “This describes a loss that isn't always socially acknowledged or supported, which can leave people feeling isolated in their grief. I love that Help Texts now provides the support that grieving pet owners desperately need and deserve.”

As an Expert Contributor, Lianna helped to craft text messages that are available in 29 languages and delivered straight to people’s phones all around the world.

In addition to being one of Help Texts’ valued expert contributors, Lianna also helps to spread the word about expert, text-based grief support as a Help Texts’ affiliate. Every time one of her clients or community members purchases text support using her affiliate code, Lianna donates her affiliate fee to the Goodbye My Friend Fund, a Fund she started years ago after receiving a meaningful donation from a gentleman who wanted to support the work she was doing to care for animals. “He wasn’t a rich man,” Lianna shares about her donor, “but he wanted to help others experience the same compassionate home care that he had received for his dog." "Any commissions I receive go into a donation account for less fortunate families who can't afford home euthanasia for their pets," Lianna explains. Over the years Lianna has extended Help Texts to support to both clients and friends and has seen first hand that the texts can offer a lifeline during dark moments, and reach people who might not otherwise receive support.

With the help of experienced veterinarians like Dr. Titcombe, Emma and her team at Help Texts are proud to be making a difference in people's lives every day, offering gentle and supportive messages as they grieve. “The beauty of our text-based support system lies in its simplicity and accessibility,” Emma says. “Grieving people receive carefully crafted messages tailored to their loss, that provide comfort, validation, and practical coping strategies. These texts serve as a constant reminder that they're not alone in their grief journey.”

If you or someone you know is struggling with the loss of a beloved pet, remember that support is available right away, and for a full year, from Help Texts.

About Help Texts

Help Texts is the world's leading clinically sound, scalable, bereavement intervention. We deliver affordable, multilingual support globally via text message for all of life's toughest moments. With extraordinary acceptability (95%) and 6-month retention (90%) rates, Help Texts' light-weight solution makes it easy for employers, providers, payers, and others to improve health and community outcomes, while also realizing significant cost savings for those in their care.

Life can be hard. Getting support shouldn't have to be. 💙 Help Texts is proud to be delivering personalized, expert grief and mental health support in 62 countries and 29 languages. All year long.

That leaves the decision to each state, and most states haven't made one. As of 2026, only eight states have a law that gives employees time off after a death. Many HR guides say six, because they leave out Colorado and Minnesota, where employees can only use sick time, they've already earned.

Even in those eight states, the law sets a minimum and leaves the rest to employers. Your company decides whether the time is paid and whether it covers people the law leaves out. In the other 42 states, your company decides everything.

What each state requires

California
What employees get: 5 days per death
Limits: Employers with 5+ employees. Unpaid unless the employer’s policy pays. Must be used within 3 months.

Illinois
What employees get: 10 workdays per death, up to 6 weeks a year
Limits: Employers with 50+ employees. Counts against the employee’s 12 weeks of FMLA leave. Must be used within 60 days.

Oregon
What employees get: 2 weeks per death, up to 4 weeks a year
Limits: Employers with 25+ employees. Counts against 12 weeks of state family leave. Must be used within 60 days.

Vermont
What employees get: 2 weeks a year, no more than 5 days in a row
Limits: Employers with 10+ employees. Counts against 12 weeks of state family leave. Can be used up to a year after the death.

Washington
What employees get: 7 days of paid family leave after a child’s death
Limits: Only for parents who would have qualified for pregnancy or new-child bonding leave. Uses up paid family leave hours.

Colorado
What employees get: Can use paid sick leave
Limits: Uses the same sick hours employees need when they’re ill.

Minnesota
What employees get: Can use paid sick leave
Limits: Uses the same sick hours employees need when they’re ill.

Maryland
What employees get: Can use paid leave already earned
Limits: Employers with 15+ employees. Only for the death of a child, spouse, or parent.

In most states, grief time comes out of other leave

In most of these states, the days an employee takes after a death are subtracted from leave, they already have.

In Illinois and Vermont, bereavement days come out of the same 12 weeks employees use to care for a seriously ill family member. An Illinois employee who used all 12 weeks of FMLA leave caring for a dying parent has no protected bereavement leave left when that parent dies.

Oregon used to work the same way. Since July 2024, caregiving leave has run through the state's paid leave program, and bereavement leave now shares its cap with leave to care for a sick child.

In Colorado and Minnesota, an employee who uses sick hours for a funeral has fewer hours left if they get sick later in the year.

California is the only state where bereavement leave stands on its own. Employees get five days for each death, in addition to any other leave they have.

Who counts as family

Most of these laws cover spouses, children, parents, siblings, and grandparents. Maryland covers only a child, spouse, or parent. Under most of these laws, an employee has no right to time off when a best friend dies or when the aunt who raised them dies.

A few states go further. Oregon's definition includes people whose relationship with the employee is the equivalent of family. Vermont includes anyone who acted as a parent to the employee or their partner. Minnesota’s definition includes aunts, uncles, and anyone whose relationship with the employee is the equivalent of family, and it lets employees name one more person each year. Your policy can include these relationships even if your state doesn't require it.

Pregnancy loss and other reproductive loss

Two states give leave specifically for reproductive loss, and a third protects time to recover physically from a miscarriage.

California gives five days after a miscarriage, stillbirth, failed adoption, failed surrogacy, or unsuccessful fertility treatment, up to 20 days a year. The employee's spouse or partner is covered too, and employers can't require any documentation.

Illinois covers similar losses, including a diagnosis that affects pregnancy or fertility. Employers can ask for documentation, but they can't require the employee to say which loss happened.

Vermont lets employees use parental leave to recover from a miscarriage. The law treats this as medical recovery, so it covers only the person who was pregnant.

If your policy asks for proof of a pregnancy loss, it asks for more than California law allows.

When a child dies

Illinois gives parents up to 12 weeks of unpaid leave when a child dies by suicide or homicide. Employers with 250 or more employees must offer 12 weeks, and employers with 50 to 249 must offer six. Parents can use the time over the full year after the death.

Twelve weeks is close to what any parent needs after a child dies, but Illinois ties it to cause of death. A parent whose child dies of cancer, or an accidental overdose gets the standard 10 workdays.

The law also lets employers require documentation that includes the cause of death. In practice, which can mean a parent handing HR a death certificate that lists their child's suicide. Illinois allows employers to ask for this. It doesn't require them to, and your policy can leave it out.

Most laws expect leave to be used within weeks of the death

Colorado's law lets employees use sick leave to grieve, attend a funeral or memorial, or handle financial and legal matters after a death. Minnesota's law uses nearly the same list, but it replaces grieving with making funeral arrangements.

Most of these laws also set short deadlines. Illinois and Oregon require bereavement leave to be used within 60 days. California allows three months. Only Vermont and the Illinois child-loss law allow a full year.

What the law leaves to employers

Most employer policies give three to five days. That covers the funeral. It doesn't cover the weeks after when the employee is still closing accounts and settling the estate, or the first birthday without the person months later.

When the policy runs out before the employee is ready, they find the time another way. They call in sick, or they come to work and can't do their job the way they used to. Some start looking for an employer that would have given them more time.

Your other employees are watching how you treat the first colleague who loses someone, because every one of them will lose someone eventually.

You can go beyond the legal minimum by:

• Letting employees split bereavement days across the first year, so they can take a day for a birthday or anniversary
• Paying for bereavement leave, even where the law allows it to be unpaid
• Letting employees decide who counts as family
• Dropping any requirement to document a cause of death or a pregnancy loss
• Training managers to check in without turning the conversation to performance
• Offering grief support that continues after the employee is back at work

So, is bereavement leave required?

For most US workers, no. There is no federal requirement, and 42 states have no bereavement law at all. Where a state law exists, it usually guarantees between five days and two weeks of unpaid leave for close relatives or simply lets employees use sick time they've already earned.

For most of your employees, the policy your company writes is the only bereavement leave they have.

Do you want help supporting your grieving employees?

Help Texts sends personalized grief support by text, tailored to the relationship, the cause of death, and the dates that matter. Texts are written by grief and mental health experts, available in 29 languages, and delivered across a full year. We even have support for managers who are supporting grieving employees.

Schedule a time to connect with our team to learn more about how to support your grieving employees with a year of steady text-based grief support.

Sources

1. “No federal law requires...” → U.S. Department of Labor, Funeral Leave: https://www.dol.gov/general/topic/benefits-leave/funeral-leave
2. California → CRD Bereavement Leave FAQ: https://calcivilrights.ca.gov/wp-content/uploads/sites/32/2023/04/Bereavement-Leave_AB-1949_FAQ_ENG.pdf
3. Illinois → Illinois Department of Labor, FBLA FAQs: https://labor.illinois.gov/faqs/flbafaqs.html
4. Oregon → Oregon BOLI, Oregon Family Leave: https://www.oregon.gov/boli/workers/pages/oregon-family-leave.aspx
5. Vermont → Vermont Department of Labor, Act 32: https://labor.vermont.gov/act-32-2025-vermonts-expanded-unpaid-family-parental-leave
6. Washington → Washington Paid Leave, loss of a child: https://paidleave.wa.gov/question/what-is-family-leave-for-the-loss-of-a-child/
7. Colorado → CDLE INFO #6B, updated February 27, 2026: https://cdle.colorado.gov/sites/cdle/files/info_%236b_rights_and_obligations_under_hfwa_2.27.2026.pdf
8. Minnesota → Minnesota Statutes § 181.9447: https://www.revisor.mn.gov/statutes/2025/cite/181.9447/subd/181.9447.4
9. Maryland → Maryland Department of Labor guidelines: https://labor.maryland.gov/labor/wages/essguide.shtml
10. California → SB 848: https://leginfo.legislature.ca.gov/faces/billNavClient.xhtml?bill_id=202320240SB848
11. 820 ILCS 156/10: https://www.ilga.gov/legislation/ilcs/documents/082001560K10.htm

Help Texts is the world's leading clinically sound, scalable bereavement intervention, delivering affordable, multilingual support globally via text message. With extraordinary acceptability (95%) and 6-month retention (90%) rates, our evidence-based solution helps donation organizations dramatically expand their aftercare impact while realizing significant operational savings.

Why Smart Donation Leaders Choose Help Texts

1. Dramatically Reduce Per-Person Aftercare Costs While Increasing Touch Points

Say you pay an aftercare coordinator a salary of $65,000 per year. If that coordinator is responsible for making calls, running support groups, and seeing families one-on-one, they're very limited in the number of people they can reach and serve each year (it will be fewer than 250 people).

If your coordinator provides individual sessions at $32/hour (based on a $65k salary), six sessions cost $192 per person, while 8-week group sessions average $170-212 per person. Help Texts delivers comprehensive year-long support for just $89 per person with package pricing—a 48-58% cost reduction—while providing 140+ meaningful interactions annually compared to 6-8 traditional touchpoints per person.

For a fraction of the price ($22,250 for a 250-subscription package), you can ensure comprehensive support for 250 families without adding staff or burdening your existing team. Your current coordinator can then focus on high-touch, specialized cases while Help Texts handles consistent, clinically sound outreach for your entire donor family population.

2. Reach Previously Underserved Populations and Fill Critical Service Gaps

Traditional aftercare programs struggle to engage men, adults over 65, families living out-of-state or in rural areas, and those with language barriers. Help Texts excels precisely where conventional services fall short:

• Men and older adults show especially high engagement rates with our text-based platform
• 29 languages ensure language barriers don't prevent families from receiving support
• Geographic flexibility means families can access grief support regardless of location
• Low-barrier format appeals to those who might never attend in-person groups or counseling

Your aftercare program can finally serve 100% of your donor families, not just those who can physically attend local services.

3. Build Stronger Support Networks Through Family and Friend Inclusion

Every Help Texts subscription includes support for two family members or friends, providing them with guidance on supporting their grieving loved one, important date reminders, and practical tips. This unique feature:

• Strengthens natural support systems around each donor family
• Reduces isolation during grief
• Creates a multiplier effect where multiple family members feel cared for by your organization
• Extends your organization's influence and positive reputation throughout families' social networks

4. Generate Measurable ROI Through Donor Ambassador Development

Strong aftercare programs create passionate advocates for donation. Help Texts systematically nurtures this transformation through personalized messaging that helps families find meaning in their loss and connection to your mission.

Real impact: Organizations using Help Texts report higher rates of families joining ambassador programs and increased community engagement. When families feel genuinely supported through their grief journey, they become authentic advocates who can influence future donation decisions in ways paid marketing never could.

"Text-based grief support is a proven family support pathway that makes it easy for organizations to elevate and streamline their aftercare experience, while simultaneously building a community of donation champions with every text." - DCI Donor Services Division Director

5. Free Your Team to Focus on High-Impact Activities While Reducing Burnout

Help Texts handles the consistent, personalized outreach that overwhelms aftercare coordinators, allowing your team to:

• Focus on in-person programming and donation events
• Reduce time spent on repetitive mailings and follow-up calls
• Concentrate on families with acute needs requiring personal intervention
• Feel confident that all families receive expert-level support, even when staff capacity is limited

Staff wellness bonus: Help Texts offers specialized support for your team members too, providing burnout prevention tips, communication scripts, and self-care strategies tailored to donation professionals.

Proven Results Donation Leaders Trust

Industry leaders consistently report Help Texts as their most effective aftercare service. Organizations see:

• 95% family satisfaction with the support received
• 90% retention through the full year of service
• 76% enrollment within the first six months of loss
• Cost savings of 48-58% compared to traditional grief services
• Expanded reach to populations previously difficult to serve

"Help Texts provides a simple, secure, low-cost aftercare solution that OPOs and tissue banks can use to deliver ongoing, highly personalized care for donor families. It's much more than just a technological solution—it's a strategic tool that can address current gaps in aftercare services while enhancing overall support." - Michael Clay, Industry Expert

Transform Your Aftercare Program Today

In an environment where donation organizations must do more with less while meeting rising family expectations, Help Texts offers the rare solution that simultaneously reduces costs, increases impact, and improves outcomes.

Your donor families deserve comprehensive support throughout their grief journey. Your organization deserves an aftercare solution that builds lasting advocacy while fitting within realistic budgets. Help Texts delivers both.

Ready to have Help Texts join your aftercare program? Contact us to learn how Help Texts can help your organization provide world-class grief support to every donor family while achieving significant cost savings and operational efficiency.

About Help Texts

Help Texts is the world's leading clinically sound, scalable, bereavement intervention. We deliver affordable, multilingual support globally via text message for all of life's toughest moments. With extraordinary acceptability (95%) and 6-month retention (90%) rates, Help Texts' light-weight solution makes it easy for employers, providers, payers, and others to improve health and community outcomes, while also realizing significant cost savings for those in their care.

Life can be hard. Getting support shouldn't have to be. 💙 Help Texts is proud to be delivering personalized, expert grief and mental health support in 62 countries and 29 languages. All year long.

Imagine being told that a group starts next Tuesday at 7 p.m. and runs for eight weeks. On paper, it sounds supportive and structured. But you are barely holding it together, and the idea of walking into a room of strangers, hearing their stories while carrying your own, feels impossible. Or you finally gather the courage to call for counseling, only to hear that the next available appointment is six weeks away. By then, the burst of strength it took to make the call has drained away.

We know the value of these services. Counseling offers a safe place to untangle complicated emotions. Groups create connection and reduce isolation. Hospice bereavement programs provide continuity after care ends. For many, these spaces are lifelines.

But not everyone can reach them, and not because they do not want help. The reasons are often obvious, but easy to overlook when we are designing support. Some grievers can't spare the time to travel or sit through a session. Others have children or caregiving duties that make attendance unrealistic. Some live far from resources or cannot afford them. And many simply do not have the emotional capacity to retell their story out loud on someone else’s timeline.

We hear this often from Help Texts subscribers. They tell us they chose text-based support because they could engage privately, when and how they felt ready. They didn't have to perform their grief in front of others or hold themselves together to speak aloud. Instead, they could take in support gently, and return to it when they had the energy.

This does not mean text messages are better than in-person care. It means that different formats meet different needs. The pros of traditional supports are real: depth, connection, accountability, and shared experience. But they also come with built-in challenges: scheduling, transportation, cost, and the emotional demand of being present with others. For some grievers, those challenges outweigh the benefits, at least for a time.

What we are missing as grief professionals is not the knowledge that people need help, but the recognition that the form of help matters just as much as the content. Wanting support and having the capacity to receive it are not the same thing.

So the invitation is this: how can we design support for the people with the least energy to spare? What would it look like to lower the threshold so that saying yes to care does not feel like another burden? How can we offer multiple doorways: structured groups for those who crave connection, counseling for those ready to go deeper, and gentler, lighter-touch options for those who are not there yet?

Practical shifts might look like:

• Offering shorter or drop-in groups for people who cannot commit to weeks of attendance.

• Following up with light, consistent touchpoints in between formal sessions.

• Creating private, self-paced resources for grievers who are not ready to share in a group.

• Building flexibility into existing services so missing a session does not mean losing support.

We may not be able to meet every need, but we can listen to what grieving people are telling us. When we do, we begin to create a grief support landscape that is more accessible, more compassionate, and more responsive to the full range of human grief.

Organizations can also strengthen their bereavement care by adding tools that meet people outside of traditional formats. Many partner with Help Texts as a way to bridge this gap, giving grievers ongoing support that complements counseling, groups, and hospice programs.

If you would like to see how Help Texts can fit into your suite of services, you can learn more at helptexts.com/for-organizations.

About Help Texts

Help Texts is the world's leading clinically sound, scalable, bereavement intervention. We deliver affordable, multilingual support globally via text message for all of life's toughest moments. With extraordinary acceptability (95%) and 6-month retention (90%) rates, Help Texts' light-weight solution makes it easy for employers, providers, payers, and others to improve health and community outcomes, while also realizing significant cost savings for those in their care.

Life can be hard. Getting support shouldn't have to be. 💙 Help Texts is proud to be delivering personalized, expert grief and mental health support in 62 countries and 29 languages. All year long.

I cannot count the number of times I heard comments like, “She was an addict. She deserved it.” or “What did she think would happen?” After her death, I often felt not only grief, but also the heavy burden of stigma. When people learned how she died, I was met with pity or probing questions about how hard it must have been to grow up with addicted parents.

It was hard, yes, but what most people missed is that my mom was so much more than her addiction.

She was a mother. A wife. She kept a house so clean you could literally eat off the floors. She was a gifted cook who could prepare meals better than most chefs in fine restaurants, seemingly without effort. She was hilarious. She loved deeply. She laughed often. Her life cannot and should not be reduced to the way it ended. Addiction was a disease she lived with, not her identity.

When she died, most people around me did not know what to say. Some said hurtful things. Others said nothing at all. And that silence can cut just as deeply as the stigma.

What to Say to Someone Grieving an Overdose

• Acknowledge the loss without judgment. Say, “I am sad to hear about your stepmom. She mattered, and I know you miss her.” Simple, honest words are better than silence.

• Use their loved one’s name. Names bring humanity back into the conversation. “What do you miss most about Sherry?” is often more comforting than broad sympathy.

• Validate the complexity. You might say, “I imagine this is a complicated kind of grief. I am here to listen if you want to share.” This recognizes that overdose grief can carry layers of stigma, anger, and love all at once.

• Remember their person beyond their death. Ask about their loved one’s hobbies, quirks, or traditions. Help keep their memory alive in ways not defined by addiction.

What Not to Say

• “They did this to themselves.” Addiction is not a moral failure. It is a disease. Comments like this dehumanize the person who died and wound those who grieve them.

• “You must be relieved.” Even if addiction strained relationships, assuming relief is deeply invalidating.

• “I know how you feel.” Unless you have also lost someone to overdose, avoid comparisons. Each grief experience is unique.

• Avoid silence. Grievers notice when their loved one’s name is never spoken again.

How to Show Up

Supporting someone grieving an overdose means holding space for both love and pain. It means remembering their person not only for how they died, but also for how they lived. It means recognizing addiction as an illness, not a moral flaw.

On this Overdose Awareness Day, I remember my stepmother for her laughter, her thoughtfulness, her love. And I invite you to do the same for those in your life who have been lost. Speak their names, honor their lives, and support their loved ones with compassion.

If you or someone you love is grieving an overdose, or if you want to know how to support someone who is, Help Texts can walk alongside you. We offer ongoing grief support by text message that includes gentle reminders, coping tips, and supportive guidance for both grievers and supporters. Subscriptions start at just $9.99: helptexts.com/get-help-texts/grief

About Help Texts

Help Texts is the world's leading clinically sound, scalable, bereavement intervention. We deliver affordable, multilingual support globally via text message for all of life's toughest moments. With extraordinary acceptability (95%) and 6-month retention (90%) rates, Help Texts' light-weight solution makes it easy for employers, providers, payers, and others to improve health and community outcomes, while also realizing significant cost savings for those in their care.

Life can be hard. Getting support shouldn't have to be. 💙 Help Texts is proud to be delivering personalized, expert grief and mental health support in 62 countries and 29 languages. All year long.

The Help Texts story began on my plane ride home from a friend’s funeral in 2015. Frustrated by how hard it was to get grief support, I spent the flight wondering how to make expert bereavement care truly accessible to everyone, regardless of location, language, or income. By the time I landed in Seattle, I’d mapped out the text messaging platform that became Help Texts. I’m proud to say we now deliver expert, evidence-based grief support in 57 countries, 27 languages, and all 50 US states.

Today I’m excited to share our latest barrier-crushing step forward: Pay-As-You-Go pricing drastically lowers the cost threshold for accessing support. Launching low-cost, no-contract subscriptions has been on our wish list for years, so this accomplishment also makes it a good time to pause and reflect on the other barriers in the grief support space that we’ve knocked down since launching in 2018.

Barrier #1: Language

Most grief support in North America is English-only. Help Texts started offering support in Spanish in 2020 and now offer immediate, personalized care in 27 languages—making grief and mental health support feel personal, warm, and culturally inclusive.

Barrier #2: Geography

We hear often from people in rural towns—small-town Pennsylvania, remote Scottish islands—grateful to receive world-class grief support without long drives or access to in-person services. No car, no problem.

Barrier #3: Technology

While the pandemic moved support online, it also introduced technology hurdles that are a barrier to support for many. Help Texts doesn’t require Zoom, internet, or even a smartphone. Just a phone that can receive text messages.

Barrier #4: Stigma

Not everyone wants therapy or to talk about their grief. For people who prefer privacy, Help Texts is a low-profile option. No appointments, no judgment—just thoughtful support on your terms.

Barrier #5: Staff Shortages

Therapist shortages and long waitlists make timely support nearly impossible. At Help Texts, there’s no waiting. Sign up in minutes, and receive your first message right away.

Barrier #6: Reading Level

We write every message at a 7th grade reading level, making our support accessible to most people ages 13 and up. Grief is hard enough—reading support shouldn’t be.

Barrier #7: Time Since Death

Many services won’t help until six months after a death. We know grief is hardest in the early days, so we support people from day one—as well as decades after a loss.

Barrier #8: Emotional Burden

Grief brain is real. When we’re grieving, concentration is low, and tasks feel overwhelming, so short, timely texts are perfect. They’re easy to receive—each one a small moment of care, right in your pocket. I’ve also now learned that receiving a text boosts dopamine which helps us feel cared for and increases motivation. Texts are easy AND they give us a little positive boost.

The Final Hurdle: Price

Our core business model at Help Texts is to work with organizations who cover the cost of grief support for those in their care. We’re honored to work with compassionate hospices, organ donation agencies, charities, funeral providers, EAPs, faith-based organizations, health plans, employers, and universities who share our commitment to making grief support free for bereaved people. They want to help people reduce the physical, mental, and financial toll that grief can take.

But not everyone is connected to one of our partners.

That’s why we’re launching pay-as-you-go pricing—so anyone can start receiving Help Texts for just $9.99, with no contract or commitment. Subscriptions can be extended, paused, or canceled at any time. Even better, our network of nearly 200 affiliates can offer grief support for just $8.99 a month. That $1 savings lasts as long as the subscription. Send us a note, and we’ll connect you with an affiliate who’s a good fit.

I started Help Texts to make grief support radically accessible—and every step we’ve taken since has moved us closer to that goal. I’m proud that our new pay-as-you-go pricing puts support within reach for more people than ever.

Because grief shouldn’t be lonely.
And help shouldn’t be hard to find.

About Help Texts

Help Texts is the world's leading clinically sound, scalable, bereavement intervention. We deliver affordable, multilingual support globally via text message for all of life's toughest moments. With extraordinary acceptability (95%) and 6-month retention (90%) rates, Help Texts' light-weight solution makes it easy for employers, providers, payers, and others to improve health and community outcomes, while also realizing significant cost savings for those in their care.

Life can be hard. Getting support shouldn't have to be. 💙 Help Texts is proud to be delivering personalized, expert grief and mental health support in 62 countries and 29 languages. All year long.

Through all of this work, over all of these years, I have learned that there will never be anything as powerful as in-person grief support.

And this is my humble expert opinion.

As I supported grieving people across all types of losses, it was clear to me that technology could never provide the help that I was able to! It would have been offensive to me for anyone to try to claim otherwise.

And then one day, someone did.

Enter Emma Payne in 2018, who reached out to me on LinkedIn. She was an entrepreneur with her own traumatic grief experience, who wanted to tell me about a text-based service she’d developed to support people who are grieving.

As you can imagine, I was really skeptical. You could say that my protective "mama bear" came out, as I openly scoffed at the idea that people could feel supported by simple text messages. I knew this because I had decades of firsthand experience, sitting one-on-one with people in their darkest moments.

I listened and politely & professionally declined—well, actually, I said, “I’ll think about it.” But in my mind, that conversation was over and I went about my day.

At that time, I was in charge of a large comprehensive bereavement program in San Diego, CA. My days were filled with bereavement phone calls, new family orientations, camper interviews, addressing school crises, running groups, supporting staff and volunteers, program operations, along with seemingly all the other duties that were required to keep our operations available for those in need. (If you know, you know)

Perhaps it was fate.
Or perfect timing.

After that conversation with Emma, many of my calls and in-person orientations that day were filled with people who had various barriers that made it impossible for them to access the care our services provided.

In one of my calls, there was a language barrier—if you've ever had to use the "language line" provided through hospice or other healthcare organizations, you know how "less than ideal" those can be for providing meaningful connection. There is always hope that a caring tone and intentions come through when put into someone else's hands (words), and you also hope that the support will resonate with them.

Next up was a family visit with a Spanish-speaking family of four who had children across a wide developmental range. The father of this family had died by suicide, and they wanted to attend support groups. In addition to English as a second language, Mom had a barely functioning car and could only afford to drive once per week, as they lived a significant distance from the grief center.

She was faced with a difficult choice. She either needed to select which two children could attend groups (their ages ranged from 4-17) or, as a family, not get any group support.

This feeling as a provider is the most awful feeling in the world—to see people in desperate need of help and at the same time realize that your ability to support them is extremely limited. I think all bereavement professionals have had to experience something like this, and it hurts on an emotional level to know that you can't do more to help.

My next appointment was with a couple whose newborn baby died from SIDS. The mother very much wanted support, but the father was checked out and refused to participate in any groups or "therapy," as he called it. We all know that mom and dad could each have benefited from some kind of support.

These back-to-back-to-back barriers frustrated me and also made me think of my call with Emma. My personal and professional desire to be able to provide some level of help to these people made me wonder about her text messaging platform.

But in my mind, nothing could compete with in-person support. Especially not a text.

I remember my inner dialogue going something like this as I started to get REALLY honest with myself, realizing that maybe I also had to check my own ego:

Honest Me to Fragile Ego Me: “You just had three examples of people who can't access your services. Although you'd like to think you're the be-all and end-all for grieving people in San Diego, you're apparently not.”

"Although you'd like to think that in-person care is what people need the most, sometimes it's not.”

“Although you like to think that technology can't support grieving people, you actually don't know.”

“Maybe, just maybe, you’re making assumptions based on your own biases and fear that maybe your services will no longer be needed if people opt in to text messaging, or that maybe technology will hurt them in some way - when you actually don't know if either of these might happen.”

And it made me ask myself: “Who am I serving with this type of restricted thinking, or more importantly, who am I NOT serving, because of this thinking?”

Which led to another conversation with Emma, that went something like this:

Honest Me to Emma: “I want to share my concerns. I am worried about the content. I am worried about what would happen if people text in. I want to understand who will be responding. I am worried about a crisis scenario. I am worried that a text may cause distress.”

“Even though I am worried about texting, I am also worried about the people I met today who can't use our services. I can't help but think about what will happen to them if they don't get any support. I can imagine that they will be worse off by receiving no support than if they at least got some support via texts.”

“So I’d be willing to try a pilot program with you. And need to see what families will see, so I want to try it myself.”

From the very beginning, I witnessed firsthand the profound and positive impact that a simple text message can have on a grieving person's journey.

Not only did my first test users love receiving support to their phones, but it didn't take away from the other ways I could provide help. In fact, it enriched my services and impact in many ways. Over time, we saw more people accessing our support, and we expanded our reach because we could still serve people who were limited by things like language, transportation, finances, childcare, etc.

Help Texts (then called Grief Coach) quickly became my favorite service offering (Selfishly, also because I was helping more people without adding to my workload). Help Texts literally freed me up to do the more personal work.

Fast forward from Skeptic to Believer.

My experience with this type of support was so powerful that I wanted to go deeper, in order to help even more people through their grief. Today, I’m the Chief Clinical Officer at Help Texts. Our research team sits on an unimaginable amount of data (quantitative and qualitative), where people from around the world are sharing, and proving, how impactful grief-informed texting is.

The daily barrage of messages of thanks that we receive are mind-blowing and heart-warming. The texts are providing meaningful, timely, and most importantly, personal resonance. When we send out surveys, they return the most beautiful and heartfelt responses about how these simple text messages have quite literally kept their broken souls tethered to hope.

As evidence of why I believe, here are some actual examples of what real people have said about the grief-informed texting service:

"The texts are discreet and sent directly to me and have really saved me some days feeling alone and guilt with my grief as some days have been so bad then a text pops up which makes you feel instantly better and not alone and .. normal! Also the hints and tips and videos have been extremely helpful too. Of all the things that GP friends and family have recommended this text service has been by far the best and most supportive to me and my family. I honestly believe I'd be in a darker place if it wasn't for these. Saved my life ❤️"

....

"I feel more relaxed after receiving a text — it reminds me to focus on myself and do self-care (like cuddle my cat, drink tea, play a game, or book an appointment)."

....

"Everyday I grieve and these amazing messages help me so much on the darkest of my days. It's helping me take time for my thoughts and think more clearly since Jorge passed away. I go back to the messages too. Even when I'm doing everyday things, receiving a message like now comforts me. I can't thank you enough 🥰 "

....

"Everything has been helpful to me, it helps to read the texts and the one about writing the letter to my son really helped me to deal with this. I told him things in the letter I couldn't bring myself to say after he passed thank you all for your support"

....

"I appreciate the consistent flow of communication with the gentle messages to help understand what you're going through and how you are feeling. You don't feel as alone and also want to make sure your loved ones aren't forgotten. Even though it was a one way communication I felt very held and that someone was thinking of me and that they cared. I don't want the messages to stop :( grief can make you feel so alone."

....

"It seems like the texts validate exactly what I'm feeling and it's like whoever sends the text knows. I appreciate this service as I am not seeing anyone professionally for my grief"

....

"Some days when you are really down and just don't know what to do with yourself a random text will pop up reminding you that it's ok and that you aren't alone and that you will get through it. It's nice to just read something positive without feeling the pressure to respond as it's not a family member or friend etc."

....

"Your message is giving me a courage to look forward thanks"

....

I started as a skeptic, and I would understand why you'd be one too, but in the end, it’s the grievers themselves who have won me over.

They have told me, time and time again, that grief-informed texting works, that it is needed, and that it has resonated for them in ways that other support couldn’t. Their reflections are honest and heartfelt, and their gratitude has shown me that - even though at first I couldn't believe it - there is a vital role that technology can play in doing at least some of what we do.

I have learned to still firmly believe that human support will always be needed, but also to acknowledge that technology, used well, can provide a benefit as another powerful modality.

Grief-informed texting is simply another support modality that people can opt into. As you know, when we are grieving, we need access to ALL of the support options – not just the ones that we, as providers, believe people need.

Signed,

A skeptic turned believer

Melissa Lunardini, Ph.D., MA, MBA, FT
Chief Clinical Officer at Help Texts

About Help Texts

Help Texts is the world's leading clinically sound, scalable, bereavement intervention. We deliver affordable, multilingual support globally via text message for all of life's toughest moments. With extraordinary acceptability (95%) and 6-month retention (90%) rates, Help Texts' light-weight solution makes it easy for employers, providers, payers, and others to improve health and community outcomes, while also realizing significant cost savings for those in their care.

Life can be hard. Getting support shouldn't have to be. 💙 Help Texts is proud to be delivering personalized, expert grief and mental health support in 62 countries and 29 languages. All year long.